18 Forever Alone Celebrities

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9. Charlie Sheen

You want to look away, but you just can’t, no matter how much Sheen’s oily Sheen hurts your eyes.

Really, what’s more fascinating than an in-the-gutter train wreck like Charlie who keeps jumping the tracks over and over and over again?

In between crashing, burning and rising from the ashes like a sadomasochistic zombie, Charlie insists on regularly acting as immature and obnoxious as possible just because–well, just because he’s Charlie Sheen.

While we felt sorry for Katy Perry getting text-dumped by Brand, we just can’t feel that sorry for Chuck, who unceremoniously received a text by his “goddess” Bree Olson telling him to take all his crapola out of her apartment and buzz off.

To list all of cheatin’ Charlie’s GFs would take another webpage so suffice to say, he’s been dumped more times than we have seen Demi Moore with a guy young enough to be her son’s classmate. Oh, and Charlie–start paying that child support you owe to Denise Richards!